Beer Story
A woman was asleep in her bed when her husband came crashing through the front door at 3am and woke her up. He staggered and tried to get up the stairs.
"What are you doing?" she shouted.
The husband replies "I'm trying to get a gallon of beer up the stairs."
"Leave it down there" she bellowed.
"I can't" he replied, "I've drunk it."
(thanks August Jensen)